The Right Condiments and Toppings

May 5, 2008

Elephant Burgers

Elephant Burgers is about different ways to approach large or ongoing projects and break them into achievable steps. It’s about creative ideas for tackling something overwhelming and making the boring parts more enjoyable. You might be able to stand the taste of that elephant by making it into burgers. But what happens when you get really tired of burgers?

We’ve seen some creative ideas with burgers at different restaurants over the past few months. It’s part of a slightly sad tale. We have a pattern of finding a really great place for burgers and going there two or three times a month. Just as it becomes part of our lives, it closes down. The last time this happened we went on a quest to find another favorite burger place.

We found out you can buy a burger with extra thick bacon, onion rings, barbeque sauce, and jalapeño cheese. You can get a burger with freshly sautéed mushrooms and Swiss cheese. You can find them with crumbled blue cheese or battered and fried jalapeño strips. There’s one with a fried egg on top and one with grilled pineapple. One is served with chopped green chilies and mozzarella cheese – it’s pretty gooey. My favorite at one of our former best-burger places had provolone cheese, freshly sautéed garlic, large pieces of pimientos, and slices of banana peppers. I almost cried when they closed down.

The fundamentals of a good burger are quality meat seasoned right and cooked on a flat griddle to get that crunchy caramelization, or cooked over a nice smoky fire to add that outdoor flavor. If you really love burgers, you probably don’t want to add much to it. But if burgers are kind of plain to you – and there’s nothing that tastes more dull and plain than elephant burgers – the right condiments and toppings make all the difference.

Do you have a really dry and tasteless elephant, like having to take a statistics class to get your degree? Think about playing your favorite music while you study, or be sure you’re in a comfortable chair with your warm fuzzy house slippers on your feet. Buy yourself a special pen and pencil just for statistics homework and make it a special occasion.

Is your elephant tough and chewy, like having to clear out the spare bedroom that became another garage? Plan a party where a group of friends helps you clear it out. Come up with some games for finding the most useless item or sorting a box the fastest. Give away party gifts from the pile of things you plan to throw out. Plan a fun purpose for the money you’ll make from the things you sell.

Are you overwhelmed by how much elephant is left? If you’re working an extra part-time job to pay down debt, it might seem like those two years will never end. Use the time to and from the job to listen to recorded workshops and talks that keep your long-term dreams in mind. If you’re planning a small business, even a part-time one, use the time at work to practice talking about the service or product you’ll offer so you can be comfortable doing that. Find new and interesting stories in magazines, books, or on-line, and practice telling them to people.

That elelpant has to be eaten. You might as well try to enjoy it.

Posted in Elephant Burgers, Zine 9: May 2008, Zines in 2008