This month we pause in the series of profiles to present an article adapted from an upcoming e-book for people considering creative career choices and entrepreneurship.

Throughout most of human history, the work people did was determined by survival. Hunters and gatherers hunted and gathered. As people learned to cultivate crops and raise animals some gave up the nomadic lifestyle and settled down to establish villages and eventually cities. Although there were a few artisans and craftsmen, most of the work was focused on providing food for survival.

Before the founding of the United States the colonies were developed mostly by people who wanted land of their own to have a farm. This meant that early in the history of the nation, most people were self-employed or small business owners. Even the merchant traders and the specialty craftsmen like woodworkers and smiths worked for themselves. Few people had a job where someone else employed them. The farmhand worked with a goal in mind of having his own farm some day. The apprentice looked forward to becoming a master and having his own clients. What changed?

The Beginning Of The Job

Jobs as we know them were developed during the industrial revolution. Mass production in factories started to replace individual craftsmen. Factory owners paid a survival wage and were able to find plenty of people living in poverty willing to trade their freedom and put up with oftentimes terrible conditions for the promise of steady income. Factories created a demand for workers centralized in cities. People left rural areas and even moved from poorer countries to industrializing countries for the chance to have a job.

As more factories opened, the idea of large corporations running businesses in multiple sites evolved. Local small business owners were replaced by store managers and regional managers. Small-town doctors were replaced by satellite clinics of a hospital or larger medical group. Blacksmiths were replaced by local hardware stores, and those were replaced by Home Depot.

Comfortable In the Job-Box Rut

Improvements in technology and decades of fighting for workers’ rights have improved the situation for workers drastically. Today the conditions in the workplace are not so much terrible as annoying, and the level of compensation and additional “benefits” makes the notion of sacrificing freedom for a job almost benign. Just a few decades into this new paradigm, many people can’t imagine earning a living in any way other than having a job working for someone else.

Today, less than one hundred and fifty years since a time of high self-employment in the U.S., most people work for someone else and are terrified of starting their own business or trying self-employment. The ideas of self-determination and possibility that defined the entrepreneurial spirit of the past have waned. Only a few people value and pursue them, and they are considered unrealistic dreamers while they chase their dreams and the lucky privileged few when they achieve their dreams.

The expectation that a person can create his or her own destiny has been replaced with the expectation that each person should look for a good job and try to keep it. Growing up we were told, “Get a good job with a good company and keep working your way up.” This message told us a good company would provide great benefits, regular pay raises and promotions, job security, and a comfortable pension or other retirement program. Even though reality has taught us for over twenty years that the pattern isn’t reliable and is no longer realistic, lots of people still cling to the message and find their comfort and security in working for someone else. It’s a recurring theme in human civilization: we give up freedom for security, especially false security.

The End Of An Era

A couple of important trends are helping change things. First, people are living and working longer. Instead of dedicating twenty-five to thirty years to one company, retiring, and then passing on, people are sticking around! A worker can spend twenty or twenty-five years in a field and become bored with it. With plenty of productive years left, a lot of people see that as a mid-career point. They wonder if they can make big changes and do something more enjoyable or rewarding, or if they’re stuck working in the same field until they can afford to retire.

A related trend that amplifies the problems of a longer work life is the collapse of job security. Companies cut employees quickly to try to keep a profit margin. Acquisitions and mergers save companies money by reducing duplicated tasks and centralizing operations, which means “redundant” positions are cut. Entire industries are changing rapidly or disappearing as technology streamlines some positions and creates others. We are living longer, working longer, and having to find a series of jobs in a series of industries in order to support ourselves.

Another big event changing work habits and options is the technology revolution. With worldwide communication, computers, and the internet, people can provide a service for a company from their homes or a location near their homes but far from the company. Providing valuable work to a company doesn’t always mean being an employee. This frees people up to provide a similar service to multiple companies as a contractor or consultant.

More important, it counters the centralizing trend of industrialization and corporate growth. One individual can develop a product and have it produced and shipped out by partnering with one or two other small businesses. With internet-based marketing, they don’t need the huge distribution outlets or corporate retail locations to begin selling their items. Control is being returned to individuals little by little. A dramatic change in work is happening.

The Return Of Freedom

People can develop a small specialty business in a narrow niche and reach enough people to stay in business by reaching out to the world through a virtual store on the internet. They can produce useful information products, including printed books or workbooks, e-books, and audio recordings, and sell them along with partners on the internet. People who advise, guide, and train others, such as corporate consultants, executive coaches, and life coaches, can live in a smaller town or travel frequently but still “be at work” through teleconferencing and video conferencing.

More than any other time in history, an individual person is in a strong position to find a type of work, or even a few different types of work, that feel like a comfortable and natural fit to their gifts and way of seeing the world. They can choose things that speak to their passions and bring them excitement, happiness, and even joy. Developing an entrepreneurial spirit is one of the highest expressions of personal growth and development. Contrariwise, it is often an unexpected result for those who commit themselves to personal growth and development but aren’t thinking about work or careers in the beginning.

Leaving The Rut

Since so many people start out on a career path with the message of choosing something safe, something secure, and something where a corporation provides the paycheck and the benefits, it’s no wonder lots of them are getting restless after a few years. Most made a general career choice in high school or early in college, before they even knew their own gifts, talents, and passions well. Even then a lot of them were sidetracked by circumstances and wound up in a career that’s not even connected to the choices they made. It’s no wonder so many feel like they “settled” and missed out on choosing a career they would really enjoy.

When people start to open the boxes where they locked away their dreams, they often hear dire warnings of failure and bankruptcy and homelessness for those who try to start their own business or simply be self-employed. Even though those warnings come from people who never followed their dreams and don’t have personal experience with self-employment, it’s scary enough to persuade a lot of people to cram their dreams back in the box and lock it tight. Over time, most of us can hardly remember those dreams or hear the connection between our dreams and our souls.

People who are frustrated in their current work and ready for a new challenge or a big change or a fresh beginning are usually estranged from their dreams. They usually know what they don’t want, but a lot of them don’t really know what they do want. Those who have a better connection to their dreams usually don’t have a clear plan or support from their friends and family, and they can’t see how to make it happen. But most of us just have a distant, long-ago memory of getting excited by the idea of having fun doing work we would love.

Life, Liberty, And The Pursuit Of Happiness

That’s not a bad place to start. In fact, people who have a notion they could do work they enjoy and find meaningful are probably way ahead of people researching business opportunities or work-from-home options just to earn more money or get away from a frustrating job. The latter are often reacting in the moment and may trade one frustrating circumstance for another, or worse, wind up losing a lot of money following a questionable path due to desperation or greed. In the face of that frustration they give up and resign themselves to the rut. Some give up their plans for change for much smaller reasons, often because their immediate circumstances change just enough for them to accept the golden handcuffs of servitude.

Those who start with a desire to enjoy their work and make it part of a more meaningful and more authentic life have a sustaining motivation to take the steps towards long-term change. They value their lives and have a long-term vision of how they will be. They exercise their liberty to take charge of their circumstances and get control of their destinies. They seek the ultimate expression of a human life on earth, discovering and developing and sharing their gifts talents, and passions – that is, pursuing happiness.

“You are wonderful!”

“That’s the most amazing project I’ve ever seen!”

“You’re the best assistant division manager in the whole company!”

Are you buying that?

Neither are your kids. They hear exaggerated praise and dismiss it. They hear vague praise and think it sounds hollow.

In chapter 5 of How To Talk So Kids Will Listen And Listen So Kids Will Talk, titled “Praise,” Faber and Mazlish recommend using specific descriptions of children’s behavior and their accomplishments. Specific descriptions are by definition not exaggerated, so they are not easily dismissed. They are not empty or hollow because they are rich in content.

As an example, when four-year-old Bryson shows mom his picture, she doesn’t say, “Wow, honey! It’s beautiful! You’re such a good little artist.” Instead, she describes what she sees. “I see green here, that looks like grass. And that’s a house with a chimney. The sun is bright yellow and you put a smile on it. I see people playing. When I look at this picture I feel happy.” Bryson knows his mother is paying attention because she is describing in detail. His work and effort are being affirmed. When she adds her emotional response to his work, he knows he has connected with her. His effort is recognized clearly and is truly appreciated.

Faber and Mazlish teach an additional powerful technique for giving effective praise that summarizes the description in one or two words. That short summary is an affirmation of a quality that is developing in the child. It is proof that he or she is on a good path towards social and personal responsibility in adulthood. It can help a child undo a negative self-perception and see himself or herself as capable and effective in an area where others have given criticism. It also becomes a touchstone the child can recall when doubts or insecurities arise.

It works like this. Jenny is in the habit of not doing things until reminded. Her second-grade teacher sees it as a pattern and looks for instances where she can give accounts of Jenny not taking care of her responsibilities. At home, mom and dad have fallen into criticizing her, too, asking her, “Why can’t you remember things?” or “What’s it going to take for you to do this without being reminded?” Jenny is developing a self-image of being forgetful and ineffective, and probably helpless.

Jenny’s dad, deciding to apply this approach, looks for an opportunity. It’s Jenny’s chore to help set the table, and one night she starts when mom announces dinner will be in five minutes. She not only puts out plates, silverware, and glasses, she asks her mom what kind of serving utensils to put out. Her dad says, “Jenny, I saw that you started your chore without a reminder tonight. You put out the plates, the silverware, and the glasses. You even put out the serving utensils.” That part is the description. The summary that follows has the power to go deeply into her heart and change how she sees herself. Dad says, “I saw initiative and consideration.”

This technique is very similar to a skill used in professional coaching called acknowledgment. A coach offers a client an acknowledgment by speaking to a quality of strength the client has which he or she can tap to accomplish challenging goals. The coach says, “I know this might be a difficult week with family getting together and old conflicts coming up, but I know you have the wisdom and compassion to stay out of old patterns.” That resonates in the part of the client that is strong and capable and gives confidence to take on the challenge. As parents, we build up those places of strength and confidence in our children when we affirm the qualities we see develop in them.

For a related article on praise and self-esteem, click here to visit Parenting By Strengths.

The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.

© Copyright Kent M. Keith 1968, renewed 2001

This isn’t really a revolutionary concept. In Shakespeare’s Julius Caesar Marc Antony delivers the line in one of the most-memorized speeches in the English language:

“The evil that men do lives after them; the good is oft interred with their bones.”

Of course, his goal was to get people to remember good deeds, but the pattern he described is true. What, then, is the point of doing good?

There has been a shift in recent years in what people are being taught about networking, mentoring, and even marketing. Instead of quid pro quo relationships (You scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours) people are encouraged to look for opportunities to help other people. It sounds like a noble, altruistic ideal.

But it’s presented with an idea like karma: if you do good things for other people, it will come back to you many times over. It will come as offers of help when you need them, an increase in your sales or client referrals, or new business opportunities. I think that’s pretty close to the old system: You scratch my back and “the universe” will make sure a lot of people scratch yours.

Is there a point in doing good simply because it’s good? I had an employee who was a single mother with three children, the youngest with birth defects. She was going through an organization to help her family get a house. They required her to move close to where the house would be built but keep her same job. That meant she was driving a long commute to work for us. I wrote a recommendation for her when she tried to change to a closer job, but that’s when the organization told her she would start over in the process if she changed jobs.

I called the case manager at the organization to discuss the situation. I explained that, although she had to be moved to part-time because her transportation was inconsistent and her disabled infant needed a lot of medical care, she was coming to work as often as she could. I explained that the medical care was near where she was living and near where the home was being built. I urged the case manager to allow her to change jobs but stay on track to get the house.

It was several weeks before the organization agreed she could switch jobs and not lose her place in line for the housing program. During that time she worked when she could, and we scheduled her for as many hours as she could work. This was not helpful in any way to me or to the other employees. It would have been much more convenient to hire a part-time person who could come in consistently when needed. In fact, after she moved to her new job, we hired a part-time employee who came on a regular schedule and things were much easier.

But it was wrong for the organization to have unreasonable requirements on a low-income single mother with a disabled child. It contradicted the mission and underlying purpose of the program, helping people who can’t otherwise qualify because of difficult life circumstances to have a house.

I did what I saw to be the right thing, to keep her as an employee as long as it took for the organization to approve her application, and to call the organization and advocate on her behalf. If I hadn’t written it here, nobody but a couple of people would even know. I’m not getting referrals from poor single mothers or from bureaucratic agency employees because of what I did. I’m not waiting around for the universe – which to me would mean God – to repay me.

I intended it as doing good simply for the sake of doing good. It was right to help that family reach their goal, and it was necessary for me to do what I did to make it happen. Sometimes the only payment for doing good is knowing that you have done good, even if everyone else forgets.

Do good anyway.

Elephant Burgers is about different ways to approach large or ongoing projects and break them into achievable steps. It’s about creative ideas for tackling something overwhelming and making the boring parts more enjoyable. You might be able to stand the taste of that elephant by making it into burgers. But what happens when you get really tired of burgers?

We’ve seen some creative ideas with burgers at different restaurants over the past few months. It’s part of a slightly sad tale. We have a pattern of finding a really great place for burgers and going there two or three times a month. Just as it becomes part of our lives, it closes down. The last time this happened we went on a quest to find another favorite burger place.

We found out you can buy a burger with extra thick bacon, onion rings, barbeque sauce, and jalapeño cheese. You can get a burger with freshly sautéed mushrooms and Swiss cheese. You can find them with crumbled blue cheese or battered and fried jalapeño strips. There’s one with a fried egg on top and one with grilled pineapple. One is served with chopped green chilies and mozzarella cheese – it’s pretty gooey. My favorite at one of our former best-burger places had provolone cheese, freshly sautéed garlic, large pieces of pimientos, and slices of banana peppers. I almost cried when they closed down.

The fundamentals of a good burger are quality meat seasoned right and cooked on a flat griddle to get that crunchy caramelization, or cooked over a nice smoky fire to add that outdoor flavor. If you really love burgers, you probably don’t want to add much to it. But if burgers are kind of plain to you – and there’s nothing that tastes more dull and plain than elephant burgers – the right condiments and toppings make all the difference.

Do you have a really dry and tasteless elephant, like having to take a statistics class to get your degree? Think about playing your favorite music while you study, or be sure you’re in a comfortable chair with your warm fuzzy house slippers on your feet. Buy yourself a special pen and pencil just for statistics homework and make it a special occasion.

Is your elephant tough and chewy, like having to clear out the spare bedroom that became another garage? Plan a party where a group of friends helps you clear it out. Come up with some games for finding the most useless item or sorting a box the fastest. Give away party gifts from the pile of things you plan to throw out. Plan a fun purpose for the money you’ll make from the things you sell.

Are you overwhelmed by how much elephant is left? If you’re working an extra part-time job to pay down debt, it might seem like those two years will never end. Use the time to and from the job to listen to recorded workshops and talks that keep your long-term dreams in mind. If you’re planning a small business, even a part-time one, use the time at work to practice talking about the service or product you’ll offer so you can be comfortable doing that. Find new and interesting stories in magazines, books, or on-line, and practice telling them to people.

That elelpant has to be eaten. You might as well try to enjoy it.